3 views of hell

[Dale Cozby]

A Baptist and Catholic and a Christian Scientist all die and go to hell.

The Devil greets them and smiles and says, "Well what do you have to say for yourselves now?"

The Baptist says, "I blew it, I thought I was saved with that one trip to the water, but I really wasn't, so now I'm here at least until the Great White throne of judgement."

The Catholic says "Well I figured I would end up here, but I got some family up there gonna pray me out of here in a few."

They all look at the CS and he says, "I am not really here, this is just a figment of my mind."

[Mike Wooldridge]

Billy Graham and Oral Roberts die and show up at the Pearly Gates at the same time. St. Peter is flustered because they're not due for two weeks and their mansions aren't ready. He calls the devil and asks if they can stay in Hell until their mansions are ready. The devil is overjoyed that he will have a couple of weeks to get these guys who've caused him so much grief. St. Peter explains the situation and Graham and Roberts agree to the stay. The next day the devil calls St. Peter and says, "You've got to get Graham and Roberts out of here, TODAY!" "Why the rush?" asks St. Peter. The devil answers, "Graham has half of these people saved and Roberts has raised almost enough money to air condition the place!"
Mike