Wilson L. Deaton
6th January 2008, 12:07 AM (00:07)
Things we learn from the movies:
Even when driving down a perfectly straight road it is necessary to turn the steering wheel back and forth.
One of a pair of identical twins is sinister.
Good guys never run out of ammunition or ever have to reload.
When you turn out the lights, everything in your bedroom will be clearly visible, but slightly blue.
When chased into a staircase, always run upstairs rather than down.
If being chased through town, you can always take cover in a passing St. Patrick’s Day parade at any time of year.
Dogs always know who’s bad and bark at them.
A police detective can only solve a case after being suspended from duty.
It’s easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
If staying in a haunted house, women investigate strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
A man will show no pain taking the most horrific beating but will wince when a woman cleans the wounds.
Cars never start the first time when you’re running away from a bad guy.
Honest, hardworking policeman are usually gunned down a day before they retire.
If a tapping sound or flashing light represents Morse Code, there is always someone near that can decipher the message.
During all crime investigations, it is necessary to visit a strip club at least once.
If you just so happened to catch a TV news bulletin, it will always contain a story that effects you personally at that precise moment.
Bombs always have big, blinking, beeping time displays.
Any lock can be picked with a credit card or paper clip.
Pretty blonde women can be world-famous, experts on nuclear fission, dinosaurs, hieroglyphics or anything else at the age of 21.
Explosions in space make noise.
You’re likely to survive any battle in any war unless you show someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
Wilson
Even when driving down a perfectly straight road it is necessary to turn the steering wheel back and forth.
One of a pair of identical twins is sinister.
Good guys never run out of ammunition or ever have to reload.
When you turn out the lights, everything in your bedroom will be clearly visible, but slightly blue.
When chased into a staircase, always run upstairs rather than down.
If being chased through town, you can always take cover in a passing St. Patrick’s Day parade at any time of year.
Dogs always know who’s bad and bark at them.
A police detective can only solve a case after being suspended from duty.
It’s easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
If staying in a haunted house, women investigate strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
A man will show no pain taking the most horrific beating but will wince when a woman cleans the wounds.
Cars never start the first time when you’re running away from a bad guy.
Honest, hardworking policeman are usually gunned down a day before they retire.
If a tapping sound or flashing light represents Morse Code, there is always someone near that can decipher the message.
During all crime investigations, it is necessary to visit a strip club at least once.
If you just so happened to catch a TV news bulletin, it will always contain a story that effects you personally at that precise moment.
Bombs always have big, blinking, beeping time displays.
Any lock can be picked with a credit card or paper clip.
Pretty blonde women can be world-famous, experts on nuclear fission, dinosaurs, hieroglyphics or anything else at the age of 21.
Explosions in space make noise.
You’re likely to survive any battle in any war unless you show someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
Wilson