Porch Painting

[Paul Whitaker]

YIKES!!!!!

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a 'handy-woman' and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood.

She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch," he said, "how much will you charge me?"

The blonde, after looking about, responded, "How about $50?"

The man agreed and told her that the paint and other materials that she might need were in the garage.

The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"

The man replied, "She should; she was standing on it. Do you think she's dumb?"

"No", replied the wife. "I guess I'm guilty of being influenced by all the 'dumb blonde' joke emails we've been receiving."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. "You're finished already?" the husband asked.

"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats."

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it to her.

"And by the way," the blonde added, "it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus.

[Edith K. Thurmond]

YIKES!!!!!

YIKES is right! You better run for your life, Paul Whitaker! There is more than one blonde woman on NN who will be after you in a flash (based on past NN history). Probably even some of the "decided" blondes. *smiles*

A couple of years ago, Ian told the funniest blonde joke that tops them all. He even said it was the supreme joke in that particular category.

Blessings on your running, :)

[Paul Whitaker]

Guess I can change the B jokes to redheads?

Our grandaughter is a brunette. She has episodes where her piano teacher has asked her, "Are you sure you don't dye your hair. Surely your roots are blonde".==

Now you see Paul running for the border!

[Gina Stevenson]

Hope you're in reeeeeeeeally good shape, Paul! Some of these women can run pretty fast, ya know! ha! :basic05

gina [who's a brunette ... nearly black, sort of gal] ;)

Guess I can change the B jokes to redheads?

Our grandaughter is a brunette. She has episodes where her piano teacher has asked her, "Are you sure you don't dye your hair. Surely your roots are blonde".==

Now you see Paul running for the border!

[BobHunt]

you're a black sorta girl......I didnt know that!

[Paul Whitaker]

Should I start swimming? We are in a secluded location out west. Would Hawaii be far enough?

My sister is a beautiful, smart, intelligent blond (as are all blonds!)?

Does that help any??

[Gina Stevenson]

Don't know how fast you are at moving forward, but you're sure good at backpeddling, Paul! You funny man! :basic05

And Bob [Hunt], it's my hair that's "nearly black." ;)

Should I start swimming? We are in a secluded location out west. Would Hawaii be far enough?

My sister is a beautiful, smart, intelligent blond (as are all blonds!)?

Does that help any??

[BobHunt]

ok Gina......as long as your sure about that! Lol j/k

[Paul Whitaker]

Intelligent Blond is not an oxymoron!

How's that for my new bumper sticker?

Still back-peddling!

[Marg Webb]

Gina, the "back peddling" remark was funnier than the joke.
I was thinking the same thing.:)
Marg.

[Paul Whitaker]

This is interesting.

I don't remember who is and who isn't blond so am sitting here trying to figure out those who are those bright, beautiful, intelligent, ... blonds.

Reading the email is sorta like a cat sitting at the net of a ping pong table watching the ball going back and forth. Fascinating!

[Edith K. Thurmond]

Intelligent Blond is not an oxymoron!

How's that for my new bumper sticker?

Still back-peddling!

You could ask Ian for his "Revenge of the Blonde" joke. It was super!

Laughing with everyone, :)

[Paul Whitaker]

It’s Not Easy Being Blonde
By: Crystal C., Westgate CVI, Thunder Bay, ON

There’s White-Out all over the computer screen. A blonde is standing near by, and a brunette sitting at the desk. Who do you think is responsible for the white marks on the screen?

The answer is neither. One of the guys in the office thought it would be fun to play a joke on the women, and he painted the screens of all the blondes, brunettes and red heads on the floor because he is a big fan of blonde jokes.

Blonde jokes. We hear them everyday. Some of them are really funny. But have you ever thought that maybe, just maybe, blondes can be smart? Well, here’s some news for you. They can be. I mean it. There is such a concept as smart blondes.

Not all blondes have nothing but air in their heads. I know this because the person sitting next to me as I write this is a blonde, and she’s not an airhead. In fact, she’s an opinionated, A-average journalist for our school newspaper. But maybe that’s not enough proof for you. So, I’ll give you a few examples.

Did you know that the majority of Playboy models, the epitome of blond bombshells, have master’s degrees and PhD’s? That’s right. Only the best brains get to be bunnies.

Lisa Kudrow, everyone’s favourite Friend, has a degree in biology from Vassar, an extremely prestigious university in the United States. She was going to do research for her father, a headache specialist, before Jon Lovitz encouraged her to take acting classes. If she hadn’t returned to California, she’d be Dr. Kudrow instead of Phoebe. Her friends even call her Einstein.

Kim Campbell, Canada’s first female prime minister, is a blonde. So is Hillary Clinton, who is a senator for New York. She has a law degree from Yale, and before she was First Lady, she was a professor at the University of Arkansas Law School, and an attorney and partner of Rose Law firm.

Now that you know that smart blondes do exist, I hope you take a moment to get to know a blonde before you assume she’s an airhead. Genetics determines intelligence, and unless it comes from a bottle, your hair colour as well. You’ll be pleasantly surprised that although sometimes they say dumb things (we all do), blondes might have something intelligent to say.

[Gina Stevenson]

... best backpeddling I have ever, ever, ever, ever, EVER seen in my entire life!! :p :rolleyes: :basic05

Yes, I have known/know some intelligent blondes ... but since some have long equated "blonde" with "more fun" ... "sexy" ... "airhead" ... etc, etc, etc ... sometimes even this brunette has slipped and said something akin to, "Oops! 'Guess I'm having a blonde moment!"

Bunnies [the playboy variety] aren't bunnies unless they're degreed!? Now, that is a new one. Is it something like, say, Lucy or Gracie Allen ... they have to be intelligent to be able to consistently [rather than intermittently, & at the wrong time] sound as tho' they like to share a man ... Hugh, or whoever?

Yeah, I couldn't believe what I didn't get changed on latenight TV a few months back ... someone was interviewing that guy & some bunnies ... and they spoke of sharing him ... and not minding it at all ... liking to share with each other, blah, blah, blah ... soon as I found the remote again, it was changed, with the tho't, "How utterly sickening!!

So, I suppose that this might not even occur ... but the "image" is spoken of like this, because it keeps those $$$ rolling in from sickos who buy playboy, and like to think this is what happens ... and these [intelligent] blondes are smart/dumb enough to play along, pretending to have regular sharing-orgies to keep getting their share of the $$$ ??? OR, are there some very intelligent women who are yet dumb enough to do such things !?!? Now you've made me wonder if even some of what we hear about that place is "bunk" ... for publicity $$$.

However ... definitely won't waste a bunch of my time/brain power trying to second-guess what I saw; hadn't tho't of it again after happening upon that interview until you mentioned the "degreed bunnies." Weird ... weird ... weird ......................... huh???

[Paul Whitaker]

My DDGBS (Drop Dead Gorgeous Blond Sister) has 3 Master's Degrees: Elementary Education, Psychology and Cross Cultural Communications.

She is no dummie!

[Gina Stevenson]

Don't doubt that, Paul. What's hard to figure is those "dumb blonde bonnies" who perhaps aren't so "dumb" afterall ... yet -- if intelligent/multi-degreed -- compromising enough to use their "smarts" to get $$ in that rather degrading manner. Sort of sad, if intelligence is indeed a requirement for being a "bunny." hmmmmmmm ... sort of a waste of intelligence, huh?

My DDGBS (Drop Dead Gorgeous Blond Sister) has 3 Master's Degrees: Elementary Education, Psychology and Cross Cultural Communications.

She is no dummie!

[Mark Metcalfe]

My wife stenciled the ceiling of our porch with vines. I am reminded that I do not have a photograph of it, but should.

MM