You teenage daughter tells you that she is....

[Barbara Moulton]

Your teenage daughter tells you that she is called to ministry. How would you feel about this?

Now, I know the spiritual answer we would all give. How wonderful it was that she was senstive to and responding to the spirit of God in her life.

But, based on what you as women have observed in your church and/or denomination would you have any cautions to give her? Would you have any concern for the opportunities that she would be given?

[Barb Bouldrey]

Barbara,

That is wonderful news and "oh, dear!" news, isn't it? You and other women in ministry know that it is a more difficult road for women.

I would not say anything that would discourage her or give her a negative attitude about women in ministry.

After all, if this is YOUR daughter you are talking about, she has not been blind and deaf all these years. She has seen the hardest days of Carl and your ministries as well as the joys.

When Stephen received his call to preach, I was awed that God would choose my son. It was a very holy, sacred time for me. Yet at the same time, I knew the struggles he would have to face if he ever pastored.

I would encourage the daughter to seek God's guidance each step of the way and see where He leads. Let her know that even until the time she enters a ministry she may not know for sure where God wants her...but to keep going forward.

Let her know that God will equip her for what He needs of her. Tell her that God will always bring her through everything she has to face...good and bad.

I certainly would not keep reminding her of how hard it is to be a women in ministry. Do not help her form negative attitudes toward districts or denominations or congregations because of pre-formed negative attitudes.

Our Missouri District must be so unique concerning women in ministry. We have women senior pastors, women associate pastors, a woman as chairman of the board of Ministerial Studies. Women on the credentials board. A woman district NYI president. And a woman on the district advisory board.

Let her know that whereever God leads her, it will not be a "secondary" assignment, because it is where God wants her.

She will discover the negatives as she goes forward. Let her find them out for herself and be available to listen and talk them out with her so she does not become negative about it.

I have seen some women in ministry that preach the gospel of "how hard it is to be a woman in ministry." I think they lose focus and lose joy.

If this is your own daughter you are talking about, you have been a great role model of a woman in ministry to her. She can tell how much you enjoy being in ministry (NOW...LOL)

Barb
Barb

[Judy Hamilton]

Barbara

a task of being a wife, and a mother to my understanding
comes first in a womans'life. Should her children be left to
the leftover energy and attention of a working mom, as were my son and daughter, there is a possile breeding ground for
the childeren to envy and perhaps inwardly become jealous of the time their mother has to devote to her ministry.

This is my first thought when reading your post. To visit with your daugter concerning the real possibilities of the ministry becoming more important than a mother child relationship

Shannon knows that as a single mom i had to work. She voiced one time when she was a teen, mom you are not here sometimes when i need you.


this was very true and also, without intending to be cruel, it cut to the marrow of my heart

A job is a job and there are set in place in most vocations an emergent family leave policy.
However as a minister this is not the case as the minister sometimes needs someone to be the minister to their lives..and sadly this does not happen too often. So the family of the minister suffers, gives up precious moments of their own lives with their family for near strangers..and should this be the norm, rather than the exception, the children can become bitter towards the church..and some youth carry this into their relationship with God

Am i wrong in this Barbara?? do not the children deserve the energy and undivided attention of the mother.

knowing we have only 24 hours in a day..how did you plan your day when your girls were young and needy? How did you save, or spread out your energy to be there for them when they needed you? They obviously felt you were there for them 100% as they have blossomed into lovely caring young women who are not plagued with memories of lonely nights and feeling they came in second place after your ministry to the masses.

My prayer for a son or daughter that is called full time into the ministry..would be for God to bring alongside a spouse that would support them in everyway imaginable, so that the call is not just to your daughter, but also to her husband. And their focus would be first toward the emotional well being and development of their children

Judy

[Barbara Moulton]

Sorry...I was posing this as a hypothetical question. Neither of my daughters feel a calling to ministry and I apologize for any misunderstanding.

I was curious at how women felt about women in ministry. To me it is about creating an atmosphere where women can explore whether they are called or not.

Do we put up roadblocks in the way of women that we wouldn't in the way of men?

The nice thing about being a women in ministry is that, for the most part, the schedule is flexible. I found it much easier to balance home and work in ministry then I did when I worked in my non ministry jobs.

[Barb Bouldrey]

Barbara,

As long as this generation lasts(my generation and older) or there are people who take the Bible literally, there will always be people who believe a woman's first responsibility is to her husband, children and home.
\
Allow I believe in the call of God on women, I do not always understand it when there are children in the home.

But then, we are a society of working mothers, anyway.

Genesis tells that God told Eve that her priority would be to her husband. That is repeated in the New Testament.

So, I do not understand why God calls women, but he does.

If God calls, God provides. God works it out.

I have as much respect for my women friends who are in the ministry as I do for the men.

Barb

[Belinda Y. Edwards]

I was curious at how women felt about women in ministry.

Very interesting sentence.

For the first time, i wonder - - are women the real stumbling block for other women to be 'successful' in ministry?


********
i am assuming that this isn't the direction you were posing the post. It is just a startling thought that struck me as i read your response to the thread.

[Barbara Moulton]

Here's my experience.

When I was 14 and announced I was called to the ministry, it was cause for celebration. My parents were thrilled.

I did some services with my dad on occasion (he was an evangelist).My DS started taking me with him to churches he was visiting once in awhile to give me chances to participate in services. I preached my first sermon when I was 16. I belonged to the "candidate's fellowship" (a fellowship group of young people who were exploring their calling). I was sent to Orangeville (ironically since that is where we are now) to assist at a church for a year before College. In College my session was made up of 65% women. I was sent as the senior pastor with an assistant to my first church.

In other words, it was accepted as just "normal". I accepted all of this as just normal.

Now I realize just how exceptional the denomination of my youth was.

In my mind, if God calls a woman, He has the same ability to help her balance home and calling as he does with a man. I spent the first nine years of my ministry simply living out my calling...this during the time when I was having and raising children. I have spent the last eleven years, ordained but trying to find a way to live out my calling.

We've had a "women in ministry" discussion many times on NazNet. My purpose in bringing it here was to explore it in a new way. Is there anything we can do as women (whether we are ordained, pastor's wives, lay leaders etc.) to create an atmosphere that gives women the freedom to explore whether God is calling them, and affirms those who declare they are called. That's why I tried to make it personal. What would YOU do if your teenage daughter (as opposed to your teenage son) told you they felt called to ministry.

Just musing.

[Belinda Y. Edwards]

Is there anything we can do as women (whether we are ordained, pastor's wives, lay leaders etc.) to create an atmosphere that gives women the freedom to explore whether God is calling them, and affirms those who declare they are called.



Good question.

Honestly, i am watching this thread because i have sons not daughters. However, i do mix and mingle with our young teens from time to time. How can i help facilitate an atmosphere that can give the young girls a freedom to explore whether God is calling?

i am not sure i have answers tonight.

[Jenny Mitchell]

I am a woman 2 years into my first pastorate. I have 6 kids - the eldest is an 18 boy and off to college (and called into ministry); then comes a 15 year old son, a 12 year old son (called into ministry); a 10 year old son (called into ministry), and 8 year old son (called to be a missionary), and a 6 year old daughter. I didn't work at all outside of the home until 2000, but God called me early in 1999 and I began taking classes at NTS that summer. Then in early 2000 we went to S. Korea and taught English at KNU for 3 semesters.

Sometimes I felt like I was short-changing my littlest ones because I wasn't as focused on their needs, but they thrived on all the attention they received in Korea. When we returned, I continued back to school full time, graduating in 2004. One month after graduation, I became the pastor of a small church in a small town in IN.

I have encountered no opposition within my local congregation to being a woman in ministry. I know it exists elsewhere, but I've never seen it. NTS was a wonderfully nurturing environment, and my D.S. has been tremendously supportive. I have a young woman joining me in ministry next month; she has a calling to missions and youth ministry, and I am looking forward to giving her opportunities to develop and explore the dimensions of her call. I have done the same for my eldest son, who has team preached with me, and preached once on his own.

All this is to say, that I wouldn't overemphasize the opposition. The God who calls will make opportunities to fulfill the call. Meanwhile, we have the responsibiity not to get in his way.

Jenny